I was top of my class at my university, and I graduated with distinction and returned to Gaza, open-minded, free-spirited and with great knowledge. His unlikely decision became a turning point in my life. Since my older brothers and sisters left school early, my father saw me as his last hope and let me travel to Canada on my own. My family, especially my brothers, tried to stand in my way, beat me up, stole my passport, and refused to let me go, but my father wanted to have at least one educated child in the family to be proud of. After graduating from high school, top of my class, I received a full scholarship to study for my first university degree at the University of Calgary, Canada. My wildest dream at the time was to get a university degree, get a job and be independent. The fused violence committed against me by my brothers did not make me give up on my dream of pursuing my education. I would not care much if my brothers and their families live away from where I live, but unfortunately, we all live in the same building. To make my life even worse, my brothers ordered their wives to treat me badly, and their wives blindly followed their orders and were hostile to me. As a result, my family especially my brothers turned against me, committed several forms of verbal and physical violence against me, treated me with disrespect and turned my life into hell. I was doing very good at high school and wanted to pursue my education, so I didn’t respect to family pressure and rejected all arranged marriages my family had arranged for me. I never wanted to accept what my sisters accepted. My sisters married through family arranged marriages before they reached the age of eighteen. In my society, women generally get married at an early age through traditional arranged marriages. All of them now are parents of many children. All my siblings responded to family pressure and accepted traditional arranged marriages. In my cultural context, women do not and are not allowed to have a voice or live on their own. Women in my society are controlled by their fathers and brothers when they are single, and by their husbands after they marry. Gaza is a patriarchal, conservative, male-dominating and close-minded society, where men are the final decision makers and have power over women within the family, and women do not have a voice and are oppressed through a culture of silence. Being a woman in Gaza is extremely difficult. While developing my family genogram, it was clear that main conflicts and various forms of violence were committed by my brothers and their wives against me, for cultural reasons. In this paper, I have decided to focus on the conflicts shown in my family genogram because these conflicts impacted my life, shaped my personality and made me the person I am today. These characteristics run on both my father’s and my mother’s sides of the family.
The characteristics that exist within my family that are a result of nature are Heart Disease, Cancer, Diabetes, High Blood Pressure, Arthritis, and Depression. The third generation includes me and my seven siblings (four sisters and three brothers) and their spouses, and in the fourth generation, I only included the number of children they have. I had a good relationship with her brother (my uncle) who passed away a few years ago, and I still have a good relationship with her sister (my aunt) who currently lives in Egypt.
My mother has one older brother and one younger sister. I still have a good relationship with one, and the other one who still lives in our house has been violent towards me most of the time in the past years. My relationships with his other two sisters were different. His brother and two of his sisters passed away, one of which was hostile to me. My father was the oldest of one brother and four sisters.
The second generation includes my parents and their siblings (my uncles and aunts from both sides). I do not recall how my relationship with them was, but my mother told me that I was close to my grandfathers and closer to my grandmothers. The first generation includes my parental and maternal grandparents who passed away when I was a little child.
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